Please Notice!!

You may have noticed the increased amount of notices for you to notice.

And, we have noticed that some of our notices have not been noticed. This is very noticeable.

It has been noticed that the responses to the notices have been noticeably unnoticeable. Therefore, this notice is to remind you to notice the notices and to respond to the notices because we do not want the notices to go unnoticed.

>From the Notice Committee for Noticing Notices

Best excuses if you get caught sleeping in your computer desk by the Boss:

·  I was working smarter, not harder.

·  I wasn’t sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement.

·  This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!

·  I’m actually doing a “Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan”(SLEEP) I learned at the last mandatory seminar you (boss) made me attend.

·  This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work!

·  I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory towards people who practice Yoga?

·  The coffee machine is broke….

·  Ah, the this is the unique and unpredictable habits of the workaholic!

·  I wasn’t sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact lenses without using my hands.

·  My work partnerwent psycho and took out a gun so I was playing dead to avoid getting shot.

·  And finally….I thought you (boss) were gone for the day……..!!!!!!

Q: What does a ghost eat for dessert?
A: I scream. (Ice cream)

Q: Where does a ghost mail his letters?
A: At the ghost office. (Post office)

Q: What did the ghost mail home while on vacation?
A: Ghostcards. (Post cards)

Q: What amusement park ride does a ghost like best?
A: The roller ghoster. (Roller coaster)

Q: What do you say to a ghost with three heads?
A: Hello, hello, hello.

Q: What's the difference between a ghost and a butcher?
A: One stays awake and the other weighs a steak.