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Generous lawyer

10/28/2011

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A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.

"Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?"

The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?"

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, "Um ... no."

The lawyer interrupts, "or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?"

The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an apology, but was interrupted again.

"or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident," the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?!"

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, said simply, "I had no idea..."

On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, "So if I don't give any money to them, why should I give any to you?"
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A job offer you cannot refuse!

10/18/2011

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Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person asked a young applicant fresh out of business school, "And what starting salary are you looking for?"
The applicant said, "In the neighborhood of Rs 12 lacs a year, depending on the benefits package."

The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks' vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50 percent of your salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red BMW?"

The applicant sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?"
And the interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it." Hehehe
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The hearing aid

10/11/2011

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Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years.
He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a new hearing aid that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.

The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor
and the doctor said, "You hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again."

To which the gentleman said, "O, I haven't told my family yet.
I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've already changed my will three times!"

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Wealthy - modern style !!

10/7/2011

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A dying granny was talking to her granddaughter:
" I may die any minute so I want you to inherit my farm including the villa, tractor, the farmhouse and all the livestock and $22,389,630 cash"

The grand daughter replied : "wow", Thanks granny, I dint know you even had a farm & all this wealth..
Where is it?

Granny says with her last dying breath....."It's on my Facebook."

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    Life is only lived once.!
    A good joke surely cheers one and all.
    Use this blog for clean Jokes for every occassion

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